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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hen Do Nightmares! WHY WHY WHY

175 replies

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 12:28

Sorry, this is more just a vent, but I'm organising a Hen do for a good friend, but, quelle surprise, the whole thing has become a quagmire of merd, and I'm not sure I've got the boots for it.
The Bride to be has decided to theme the whole thing around the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and we all have to go dressed as characters. Straight-away there were issues with three people wanting to be Black Widow. I've tried to steer people towards other characters; otherwise, at best, it'll just look like a bunch of bad Scarlett Johannsen impersonators have shoehorned themselves into faux leather pants and at worst that people will think three of Wagner's Rhinemaidens have turned up for a BDSM party...I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well. I secretly think she may believe I was making a snide comment about the time she came to a picnic wearing ripped trousers....anyway....I spoke to the B2B and explained I was frustrated and that I had a good mind to go dressed as Bane, ( And do the voice all night) well, she burst into tears and accused me of trying to sabotage the whole thing whilst shouting 'You know that BANE is DC not Marvel. Anyway she calmed down and I've compromised and am going as Thanos. It's just such a headache, she thinks I can just snap my fingers and it'll happen ( Which, ironically if I was Thanos I could do....' Then there's the venue....nothing too small..so the Paris catacombs are out, nothing to big and impersonal, so ditto the deconsecrated power station. One of the girls has a phobia of boats, so HMS Belfast is off the list. Why do these things have to be so complicated? For my Hen Do, we had a simple chicken dinner and an evening watching Sumo Wrestling in Edinburgh. Everyone had a great time and got a lovely gift bag with some Japanese shortbread and a pair of balls. Anyway rant over....But AIBU? Or is it time to really pare back Hen do's?

OP posts:
ElectoralControversy · 05/07/2026 15:09

zanahoria · 05/07/2026 14:52

"You know that BANE is DC not Marvel."

I would have been out at this point

I was actually thinking this as I read it 😳
Sounds much better than most hen party themes, I'm also up for being Loki though I've heard the horns are an absolute bugger 🤔

Cyclebabble · 05/07/2026 15:14

...we decided on a Cinderella theme. Imagine my surprise that the Bride's sisters were offended when I said they would make great Ugly Sisters ....

CryptoFascist · 05/07/2026 15:24

Lots of Dad jokes for a female poster...

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 15:25

BeautifulViolets · 05/07/2026 14:46

Whether this is real or not, paragraphs are your friend - people may be arsed to read it then. Or not.

Oooohhhh Polly Punctuation has her hat on.....😦

OP posts:
RampantIvy · 05/07/2026 15:26

I would have let the other hens just wear what they wanted to wear. Having such a prescriptive theme was always going to fail.

Being the MOH seems to be such a poisoned chalice these days. I would have refused the role and refused to dress up in a ridiculous outfit.

CountryMouse22 · 05/07/2026 15:27

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 15:25

Oooohhhh Polly Punctuation has her hat on.....😦

And Carrie Comma and Simon Semi-Colon!

icingonmycupcake · 05/07/2026 15:28

I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well. I secretly think she may believe I was making a snide comment about the time she came to a picnic wearing ripped trousers....anyway....

😂😂😂

MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 15:29

CryptoFascist · 05/07/2026 15:24

Lots of Dad jokes for a female poster...

Yes indeed.

GootGoot · 05/07/2026 15:30

Speaking of hen dos do you really play the game where you ask a man at a bar for his boxers?

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 15:31

MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 15:29

Yes indeed.

Dad Jokes...??? I think not my sweet truffle....

OP posts:
TheEllisGreyMethod · 05/07/2026 15:31

I'm also not sure if this is real but it did make me laugh

However I absolutely would not go to a hen do if I was made to dress up as a marvel character. I'm not an 8 year old boy.

MaryBeardsShoes · 05/07/2026 15:31

MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 13:48

I think you've missed out someone being pregnant.

With twins

Couldyounot · 05/07/2026 15:32

...suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well...

Can't imagine why 🤔

MaryBeardsShoes · 05/07/2026 15:32

🤣 best three minutes of my day.

dancingdeidre · 05/07/2026 15:34

Funny that that woman was offended at the suggestion she would make a good Hulk. People can be so touchy.

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 15:37

MaryBeardsShoes · 05/07/2026 15:32

🤣 best three minutes of my day.

Thanks Mary. Have a good rest of the day.

OP posts:
MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 15:38

MaryBeardsShoes · 05/07/2026 15:31

With twins

Of course 😂

MaCheCazzo · 05/07/2026 15:40

MaryBeardsShoes · 05/07/2026 15:32

🤣 best three minutes of my day.

You must be having a spectacularly shit day. Thoughts and prayers hun because I can't imagine a set of circumstances where this pile of steaming arseholes is either convincing or funny.

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 15:45

MaCheCazzo · 05/07/2026 15:40

You must be having a spectacularly shit day. Thoughts and prayers hun because I can't imagine a set of circumstances where this pile of steaming arseholes is either convincing or funny.

Ooohhhh you sound like a charmer. 😂I can assure you I'm having a lovely day. Thanks for the thoughts pumpkin.... Hope the rash clears up.

OP posts:
KateRush · 05/07/2026 15:51

Thanks OP- you have immensely cheered me up on a rather dull Sunday! This would be great as a comedy sketch. Obviously I know it's not true😂

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 15:52

KateRush · 05/07/2026 15:51

Thanks OP- you have immensely cheered me up on a rather dull Sunday! This would be great as a comedy sketch. Obviously I know it's not true😂

Have a lovely rest of the day.😀

OP posts:
IsThistheMiddleofNowhere · 05/07/2026 15:52

You have my full sympathy. Sounds more like organising a party for an eight year old. Yes, hen dos have got ridiculous. The desire to be noticed and cause a stir seems to have overshadowed the idea of spending time quality time with your best friends before the big day.

MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 15:54

IsThistheMiddleofNowhere · 05/07/2026 15:52

You have my full sympathy. Sounds more like organising a party for an eight year old. Yes, hen dos have got ridiculous. The desire to be noticed and cause a stir seems to have overshadowed the idea of spending time quality time with your best friends before the big day.

Yes, obviously it's made up, but I do agree that Hen dos have got a bit crazy.

Cakeandcardio · 05/07/2026 15:55

You are a good writer, OP. I enjoyed this.

Twiglets1 · 05/07/2026 16:02

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 12:28

Sorry, this is more just a vent, but I'm organising a Hen do for a good friend, but, quelle surprise, the whole thing has become a quagmire of merd, and I'm not sure I've got the boots for it.
The Bride to be has decided to theme the whole thing around the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and we all have to go dressed as characters. Straight-away there were issues with three people wanting to be Black Widow. I've tried to steer people towards other characters; otherwise, at best, it'll just look like a bunch of bad Scarlett Johannsen impersonators have shoehorned themselves into faux leather pants and at worst that people will think three of Wagner's Rhinemaidens have turned up for a BDSM party...I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well. I secretly think she may believe I was making a snide comment about the time she came to a picnic wearing ripped trousers....anyway....I spoke to the B2B and explained I was frustrated and that I had a good mind to go dressed as Bane, ( And do the voice all night) well, she burst into tears and accused me of trying to sabotage the whole thing whilst shouting 'You know that BANE is DC not Marvel. Anyway she calmed down and I've compromised and am going as Thanos. It's just such a headache, she thinks I can just snap my fingers and it'll happen ( Which, ironically if I was Thanos I could do....' Then there's the venue....nothing too small..so the Paris catacombs are out, nothing to big and impersonal, so ditto the deconsecrated power station. One of the girls has a phobia of boats, so HMS Belfast is off the list. Why do these things have to be so complicated? For my Hen Do, we had a simple chicken dinner and an evening watching Sumo Wrestling in Edinburgh. Everyone had a great time and got a lovely gift bag with some Japanese shortbread and a pair of balls. Anyway rant over....But AIBU? Or is it time to really pare back Hen do's?

I enjoyed that @MaeWestNeverForgets and YANBU