Help end medical misogyny. Sign our petition.

Help end medical misogyny.
Sign our petition.

Sign the petition

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hen Do Nightmares! WHY WHY WHY

175 replies

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 12:28

Sorry, this is more just a vent, but I'm organising a Hen do for a good friend, but, quelle surprise, the whole thing has become a quagmire of merd, and I'm not sure I've got the boots for it.
The Bride to be has decided to theme the whole thing around the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and we all have to go dressed as characters. Straight-away there were issues with three people wanting to be Black Widow. I've tried to steer people towards other characters; otherwise, at best, it'll just look like a bunch of bad Scarlett Johannsen impersonators have shoehorned themselves into faux leather pants and at worst that people will think three of Wagner's Rhinemaidens have turned up for a BDSM party...I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well. I secretly think she may believe I was making a snide comment about the time she came to a picnic wearing ripped trousers....anyway....I spoke to the B2B and explained I was frustrated and that I had a good mind to go dressed as Bane, ( And do the voice all night) well, she burst into tears and accused me of trying to sabotage the whole thing whilst shouting 'You know that BANE is DC not Marvel. Anyway she calmed down and I've compromised and am going as Thanos. It's just such a headache, she thinks I can just snap my fingers and it'll happen ( Which, ironically if I was Thanos I could do....' Then there's the venue....nothing too small..so the Paris catacombs are out, nothing to big and impersonal, so ditto the deconsecrated power station. One of the girls has a phobia of boats, so HMS Belfast is off the list. Why do these things have to be so complicated? For my Hen Do, we had a simple chicken dinner and an evening watching Sumo Wrestling in Edinburgh. Everyone had a great time and got a lovely gift bag with some Japanese shortbread and a pair of balls. Anyway rant over....But AIBU? Or is it time to really pare back Hen do's?

OP posts:
MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 14:12

Shoola · 05/07/2026 14:10

This is my hen do you are talking about and you are no longer chief hen! You should come as Dreykov as that won't even require a costume.

I warned you about choosing Brenda. You know what she's like. That awful shortbread was just sugar and lard as well.

ThatCyanCat · 05/07/2026 14:13

I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well.

😂

On the one hand, you played this far too early. It might have been just about believable without this in the OP and it would have been more artful and able to slip it in later. On the other, it's so funny I forgive you entirely and I'll keep reading anyway. It's a great concept.

PistachioTiramisu · 05/07/2026 14:13

I'm so glad I haven't got a single idea what you are talking about!

ChristmasCwtch · 05/07/2026 14:13

It’s obviously a satirical post, but gone straight over most readers’ heads 😂

HeBeaverandSheBeaver · 05/07/2026 14:14

Weird. Just let people go as whoever. Who care if there are 20 cat women.

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 14:15

ThatCyanCat · 05/07/2026 14:13

I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well.

😂

On the one hand, you played this far too early. It might have been just about believable without this in the OP and it would have been more artful and able to slip it in later. On the other, it's so funny I forgive you entirely and I'll keep reading anyway. It's a great concept.

Sigh....I went green too early....story of my life.....😃

OP posts:
MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 14:17

HeBeaverandSheBeaver · 05/07/2026 14:14

Weird. Just let people go as whoever. Who care if there are 20 cat women.

CATWOMAN IS DC NOT MARVEL......!!!!!!!!!!!! God, don't let my friend hear you, it'd take all my strength to stop her shoving an eternity stone up your fundement..

OP posts:
Lassofnorth · 05/07/2026 14:17

I mean this is obviously a wind up but miserable old me agrees. A little dinner in or out and a glass of wine or something for whoever wants it are the best hen dos for me.

MaeWestNeverForgets · 05/07/2026 14:18

HeBeaverandSheBeaver · 05/07/2026 14:14

Weird. Just let people go as whoever. Who care if there are 20 cat women.

CATWOMAN IS DC NOT MARVEL......!!!!!!!!!!!! God, don't let my friend hear you, it'd take all my strength to stop her shov an eternity stone up your fundement..

OP posts:
chocoluv · 05/07/2026 14:21

You are a better person than me.

If the B2B wants something specific then she can organise it herself.

mathanxiety · 05/07/2026 14:24

I don't know what's funnier, the OP or the very earnest responses.

GrinStarGlitterball

YerMasYerDa · 05/07/2026 14:27

ChristmasCwtch · 05/07/2026 14:13

It’s obviously a satirical post, but gone straight over most readers’ heads 😂

Definitely went over mine. I thought it was a bit of creative writing practice, but that we were supposed to think it was real. Or something …

LeedsLoiner · 05/07/2026 14:29

I am Groot…

wandererofthekingdom · 05/07/2026 14:36

This is hilarious! Marvel fancy dress on HMS Belfast sounds like an 8 year old boys dream day out 😂

BeautifulViolets · 05/07/2026 14:46

Whether this is real or not, paragraphs are your friend - people may be arsed to read it then. Or not.

MadeInGrimsby · 05/07/2026 14:48

BeautifulViolets · 05/07/2026 14:46

Whether this is real or not, paragraphs are your friend - people may be arsed to read it then. Or not.

Yes, that certainly would have made it more readable, if not more plausible.

zanahoria · 05/07/2026 14:49

Sounds like you want to be the invisible woman

IdentifyingAsAWoollyMammoth · 05/07/2026 14:51

Bravo. I just hope some bridezillas read this and it makes them stop and think that while they've not gone as far as this fictional hen do that theirs probably is being unreasonable.

zanahoria · 05/07/2026 14:52

"You know that BANE is DC not Marvel."

I would have been out at this point

zanahoria · 05/07/2026 14:53

IdentifyingAsAWoollyMammoth · 05/07/2026 14:51

Bravo. I just hope some bridezillas read this and it makes them stop and think that while they've not gone as far as this fictional hen do that theirs probably is being unreasonable.

Is bridezilla Marvel or DC?

OriginalUsername2 · 05/07/2026 14:59

I tried to gently, but in a lighthearted way to suggest that one of the girls, given her haircut and build ( And I'm not judging) could go as The Hulk, but this didn't go down well.

!!!

You thought this would go down well?!

Anonyhouse · 05/07/2026 15:04

YABVU. No self respecting marvel party planner would even mention a DC character. Think the bride should be reconsidering her MOH at this point, i bet hulk hair wouldn’t make such a faux pas and would be delighted to have 3 black widows

thestudio · 05/07/2026 15:07

Bravo OP.

I would definitely have said how much I was looking forward to it, and when you complained I didn't turn up I'd have rolled my eyes and said I came as the Invisible Woman.

Mcdhotchoc · 05/07/2026 15:08

I'm with you.

Best of the last few years, 80s disco. Finished at 11.00. At home in bed by 12.00. £35 a head including food.
No travelling, no arguments. Bung me your £35 and then come or don't. Everyone still talks about how refreshing it was!

Wetcoatsandmudagain · 05/07/2026 15:08

Totally baffles me as to why these hen/ stag dos have become so ridiculously over the top, expensive and long! They sound more bloody agro than than it’s worth.