Is this a logical reason to change a baby’s name?

[MongerNoLonger]

My DH is from Spain, so we decided to give our child a name that is common in Spain. The problem is that I’ve noticed that people intentionally try to avoid saying her name. I believe it is because they’re worried that they’re going to mispronounce it or feeling self-conscious that they’re going to sound strange whilst saying it (because it doesn’t sound as natural when said with an English accent). Even friends and family will call her the baby or little one instead of saying her actual name (whereas my nephews have always been referred to as their actual names).

She’s a few months old, and I think that it would be wise to change it now (before she becomes aware of her name). I really don’t want my child to endure a lifetime of people going to great lengths to avoid saying her name. Our first names are such a core part of our identity. What are your thoughts?

Cant tell without knowing the name

Definitely this.
One of my grandchildren has a Spanish name starting with a J . It hasn't been an issue.
No one should feel they have to ignore half of their heritage just because some people avoid trying to say their name.

A lot of British people move to Spain and some British names are difficult for Spanish people to say. But I doubt they would even think about changing their name to one that is easier for a Spanish speaker to say.

I wouldn't change the name but maybe theres a nickname that you could use that might be easier?

I would guess Ainhoa (Basque). Very popular name in Spain. My husband is also Spanish and we gave our son an English first name and Spanish middle name to avoid frequent mispronunciation. Maybe you can use her name in the immediate family and use an Anglicised nickname more widely (like Annie, if her name is Ainhoa)?

No, it’s not a logical reason. People can pronounce many English names wrong too! I suspect that many of the people avoiding saying her name misheard you when you told them, so aren’t saying it because they think they might get it wrong. My neighbour had a little girl, I admired her and asked her name, but I didn’t quite catch it. I then asked another neighbour and she said she wasn’t sure either! (It sounded a kind of mix of Nahla/Nayla/Mahla/Mayla/Nyla/Myla).

Just repeat the name to people, spelling it out, and promouncing it slowly in syllables. In my example above, say the child was called Mahla, you’d spell it out, emphasing the ‘M’ at the beginning then saying something like ‘Mah’ like calling your mum “ma” then ‘luh’ at the end.

Dont change her name. It would be silly to do so IMO.

I wouldn't change it but I'd shorted it if possible or a nickname.. I have a very long first name which has always been shortened. My daughter has a perfectly ordinary first name but we often use her nickname which rhymes with her name, no idea how that came about.

Most of the sounds in Italian can be achieved by an English speaker but that's not the case with Spanish.

I am someone who has had to endure a lifetime of people struggling to pronounce their name. It's a total PITA. If you've noticed it's an issue already then yes, change it. I don't use my real name when booking restaurants etc because it's just not worth the hassle. When asked for my name I actually have to think about what's the easiest option here.

Yes, or simply that it takes people (often including the parents) ages to start referring to a new baby by its name, after it’s been ‘the baby’ or some in utero nickname throughout pregnancy. DH’s nephew and his wife have a baby of about two months old and I don’t think I’ve heard anyone call her by her name yet.

My niece is 3 and I tried many times to pronounce her Arabic name correctly. But I am corrected every time but I am English and very northern so it is never going to sound right as someone who’s native in that language. So since she was about 3 months old I have called her a different name entirely that I can pronounce.

Hard to comment on without knowing the name, but there are certainly a lot of Spanish girls names that are easy to pronounce internationally. My friend’s wife is Spanish and called Elena. I also know a Carmen and a Mia

Yeah but you’re talking about a child here who has to grow up in this country and will want nothing more that to fit in. Imagine that every time you say your name people are like “what?” or they avoid saying it altogether.

Sheila and Ian who move to the Costa del Sol as pensioners don’t give a shit about fitting in and can’t even be arsed to learn Spanish so that’s not comparable. You can’t compare a child being saddled with an unpronounceable name with someone moving to another country as an adult.

People are so hung up about pronunciation of non English names and how it must be absolutely correct and nobody should ever get it wrong. It’s seen as an insult that people won’t get it exactly correct and how dare they. I have an English name, it is pronounced so many different ways depending on where in the country I am, and also when travelling abroad. English accents vary greatly in how they pronounce vowel sounds, just the same as how names are pronounced in different countries. I worked with a woman called Evelyn. She used to get so worked up if people called her Eh-vlyn “it’s eeevlyn” which was strange to me because two other people I knew were Eh-vlyn. My surname is a relatively common one in the U.K., but is a non English word. When I go to other countries, particularly the country is it from, it is pronounced entirely differently. In all these cases, I know what they mean when I hear it so I answer it.

Both my names have about 3 different ways of spelling, I get annoyed when they are spelled incorrectly, consistently, particularly when it’s right there in my email address and signature, that’s just rude. But pronunciation is not an issue.

When British people refuse even to try foreign sounding names, there is usually more to it than a simple reluctance to get it wrong, because the people with those names generally couldn’t give a toss.

Which sounds can’t you make? Your vocal cords are the same as any other human, surely you can learn to do it? Why wouldn’t you?

As someone who has had their name mispronounced all her life I can tell you that you are setting her up for a life that is at best awkward and at worst psychologically damaging. Our name is our identity. Fgs do not deliberately make life more difficult for your daughter. Change her name or find a shortened version everyone can pronounce.

I’m not French but chose Madeleine for my eldest. My Glaswegian father could say it fine, but had real difficulty with the spelling. I taught him a rhyme to remember it by!
I’m guessing you didn’t go for a straightforward name like Ana or Maria!

I wouldn’t change it, but say it a lot in their presence, probably by directly saying it to my child: Ximena/Beatriz/etc, darling, shall mummy change your nappy? Is Ximena smiling at mummy or do you have wind?

Lots and lots of repetition will mean baby recognises her name and it will eventually sink in. You love the name and chose it for that reason - don’t let other people’s obstinacy shape your decisions.

Why do some posters ask for your thoughts and then don’t come back to comment on said thoughts? So irritating.

Your family should learn her name or attempt to call her by it even if not quite the correct pronunciation.
Nearly right often sounds worse than something else.

British people could just try a bit harder and not be so bloody weird about other languages. 'British' people is unfair -there are plenty of British people who can speak languages with non-English sounds.

there are some sounds that some people can’t say depending on the language they’ve been brought up speaking and no matter how hard you try it’s just not physically possible.
This

you just need to teach people how to pronounce it and they’ll get there eventually.
Not true. Some will, most won't.

You are wrong. Babies can make all the sounds needed for every language in the world but they gradually lose the ability to say sounds that they do not hear every day. There are therefore some sounds in foreign languages that people who speak only English cannot pronounce. All they can do is map English sounds onto a name and come up with the best approximation they can.
The easiest examples of this process to understand is the inability of Japanese speakers to distinguish R and L and certain click sounds in African languages.

Give her a nickname

We lived in a Spanish-speaking country when I was a child and my dad did use a Spanish name at times because the local people couldn’t say his. He was a temporary Francisco! No problem at all.

All this about the British being weird with ‘foreign’ names and being bad at accents is silly, the usual self-hating stuff. Spanish people can’t say my name properly. I happily accept the Spanish version when I’m there. People from any country may struggle to say a name not in their first language.

Personally I’d have chosen a Spanish name that can be said easily in English if my child were growing up in the UK. Speak to your family OP and ask if they’re worried abiut saying the name wrong. Of course you may offend them if it’s not an issue! Without knowing the name it’s hard to judge how English speakers would react.

This. I really don’t understand why people don’t want to make their child’s life as easy as possible. That includes not saddling them with a name that nobody can pronounce and that they will get teased about. If you want an unpronounceable name, change your own one.

In Spain, the newspapers will use Spanish equivalents of names, eg King Charles will be called Carlos in a Spanish newspaper. English people called Claire or Helen would normally be called Clara and Elena by Spanish people. They don’t tend to bend over backwards to pronounce foreign names.

@BoredZelda, Which sounds can’t you make? Your vocal cords are the same as any other human, surely you can learn to do it? Why wouldn’t you?
The letters in Arabic don't all have equivalent English sounds. Ghayn, qaf, and khaa are probably more or less impossible unless you have used similar sounds in a different language. Some sounds might sound similar to a non-speaker but different to an Arabic speaker.
Some letters are said differently in different versions of Arabic.

Arabic doesn't have some of the sounds you get in English.

It isn't a case of 'teaching' people.