Dieting is horrendous

[SassyLemonFish]

Just looking for sympathy really.

I’ve a bmi of 28. I need to lose a lot of weight. For the last two weeks I’ve been good but MY GOD the hunger and sheer depressing nature of it all. My BMR is only 1600. Sticking to 1000 or less is so hard.

My husband, on the other hand, seems to have no hunger and amazing self control. Last night he ate a single sweet potato and declared that as his dinner. His BMR is 2700. I can see him visibly changing before my eyes.

I guess I’m just jealous.

I think you can probably fill up on protein and veggies and still loose weight while being less miserable and hungry. What sort of foods are you eating?

1000 calories a day is insane. What's your age, weight, height and activity level? It sounds like your calorie deficit is far too dramatic!

There’s a couple of YouTubers that I have found really helpful- DanielJrStretch and Madelaine Rascan. Both are advocates of not going to hard on calorie deficits, upping protein and fibre, weights and step counts. I have found their advice simple and sustainable and they are good, entertaining presenters as well. Be prepared to eat lots of eggs, cottage cheese and lean animal protein! Learn to love roast squash and just settle in to a long term change of habits.

What are you eating?

1000kcal of potatoes, soup, veg, fruit, ice lollies, tofu etc is high volume and you should be able to manage quite comfortably.

1000kcal can also be used very quickly with a few bowls of cereal and a sandwich, which would make anyone feel hungry.

It's up to you of course, but it's a miserable way to do it. Your choice though.

Oh my goodness you poor thing, yes it’s understandable you feel awful dieting like that. Stop!!

This is a better plan

1. Find an activity or sport you love and do it a couple of times a week
2. Go and do strength training at a gym x2 a week
3. walk as much as possible, especially after meals

Do this for at least 3 months. Don’t change your diet in that time.

Only then, once you’ve built some fitness and muscle, you can gently tweak your diet. Your newly improved metabolism will help you lose weight IF you maintain the exercise alongside.

TLDR: Exercise loads for 3 months. Only tweak diet after that.

My BMI is 42.9.
to get a hysterectomy I have to have a bmi of 35 or less.
because I can’t have the hysterectomy, I have to have prostap, toibolone, desogesterol amongst others. All the lovely drugs that make you retain weight. The ones that turn a cup of water into fat. It’s fucking impossible, so depressing and even worse when some twat says “well just go on monjaro” like the cost isn’t extortionate and it doesn’t lead to massive health complications down the road. (Especially if like me you have other long standing heart issues that it cannot have been tested for).
Even worse when that twat saying “just go on monjaro” is your bloody mum who has lost masses of weight on it, but is now obsessed and struggling….
With you in solidarity.

Never compare yourself to a man losing weight. They are built differently physically and mentally. Usually (not always) in my experience they find it easier to lose weight.

1000 is way to low! You shouldn't be eating under your BMR. You should be eating up to 500 under your TDEE.

My BMI is slightly higher at 31 and I' m on 1600 calories min with exercising 3 times a week. Its slow but steady weight loss

1000 calories is actually going to hurt you. Up it to 1400 and go for high volume, low calories.
Example- Breakfast - 100g greek yogurt, a banana, 100g strawberries, 30g blueberries and a small handful of granola is around 300 calories.

OR
Shashuska - A whole tin of tomatoes, 1 onion, garlic, cayenne, paprika - 2 egg, 300 calories.

Lunch - a whole cucumber, 2 tins of tuna, half a tin of sweetcorn and half a red onion. Dressing - 2 tablespoon greek yogurt with a tablespoon of mayo and a teaspoon of mustard. Add some diced pickle and dill. 500 calories

OR

Ramen noodles with veg and cooked chicken - 300-400 calories

Dinner - 120g chicken, 100g rice, a HUGE salad Approx 450 calories.

OR

https://www.instagram.com/p/DYlF4TKtJT8/ Greek chicken and salad 560 calories.

Biggest things that can catch you out... None diet fizzy drinks, cooking oil, dressings.

I do not feel hungry at all and lost 3 kg in 5 weeks starting at 73 kg. Think big plates, low calories - berries, melon, greek yogurt, cucumber, courgettes, peppers, cauliflower, cabbage.

Because it’s life changing, for exactly the reason you’ve stated, dieting is horrendous. Muscle mass loss isn’t inevitable, as with any kind of weight loss you need to manage muscle loss, MJ isn’t different in that regard.

I agree with others. Up your calories by at least 200 cal a day and eat low calorie high volume foods - broth based soups, lots of veg, apples, carrots, watermelon in this weather. And healthy protein.

It is horrendous, mentally and physically.

What are you eating OP?

Are you drinking any alcohol?

You can get GLPs legitimately with a BMI of 25 now.

Dieting is DEFINITELY horrendous! I'm on Mounjaro (for diabetes, so only 7.5 which is a low dose) and it's still horrendous.

You have to remember that you're in it for the long haul - and if you make things too difficult for yourself you just won't stick to it. I allow myself roughly 1200 calories a day and usually manage that, but I eat a LOT of salad and vegetables to fill myself up, and drink a lot of water. I know myself, so I allow myself treats of lower calorie crisps and chocolate brownies etc, all under 100 calories, and ensure I include them within my daily calorie allowance. I also buy myself ready-meals as my big problem is portion control and they are portion controlled, and calorie counted, already. I have discovered that Morrisons reduced fat sausages are delicious! (In my opinion, obviously). Nice and meaty and not overly peppery or herby, neither of which I like. We're having sausages tonight - I will have 2 with a lot of cabbage and DH will have 3 with cabbage, mash and onion gravy. I won't feel deprived because I really like sausages and cabbage, I'm not bothered about mash and I have never liked gravy with sausages.

Different things work for different people, you just have to find what works for you. Good luck.

Have you considered intermittent fasting? I had previously done calorie counting and found it so miserable and also took up so much brain space thinking about it. I started doing 8:16 over 2 years ago- I just only eat between 12noon and 8pm (ish, sometimes a shorter period) and outside of that have only water or black tea/ coffee (no sugars, sweeteners). I've found it so much easier as I don't have to think about it and if I keep myself busy in the morning I don't actually miss the food which really surprised me. The 8pm curfew reduces evening snacking/ drinking. I got to my target weight pretty easily and have continued it, but am a bit more flexible these days and then just go stricter if I notice I've gone up a few pounds

@SassyLemonFish use the MyNetDiary app (Apple with measuring tape logo), it’s free, and try to hit your protein levels within your calorie allowance whilst keeping saturated fat down. You scan barcodes and it tells you exactly what’s in each food. I lost 10lb using this in 4 weeks. I did exercise too though.

Whats also good about this App is there is a community all sharing their journeys and encouraging each other. So, you never feel you’re doing it alone. They share great tips too.

Either do a very low calorie diet for a short time and accept that you'll feel ill, or eat sensibly but with fewer calories than you need.

What are you eating?

1000 calories could be a large volume of mainly veg with some protein and a tiny bit of fat or it could be 3/4 of a packet of biscuits.

The first one would probably just be a bit hard, and the second one is just ridiculous.

This is clearly what we’re missing. I’m not choosing to feel anything. I feel it.

I don’t enjoy most healthy foods. I eat them because I should but I don’t enjoy them (or if I do with a massive side helping of something unhealthy - corn on the cob with massive slab of butter and salt oh yes!) I do enjoy unhealthy ones: fast food, cake, hot chocolate with cream, sweets …

So either I eat the unhealthy foods and am fat and feel shit or eat the healthy ones and walk round feeling deprived.

It isn’t a choice! I just am in agreement with the OP here.

Surely just exercise and burn more and eat sensibly. Smaller portions, lay off the alcohol and cake (but don't totally go without). If you are starving you simply aren't going to stick to it. If you want to lose weight and keep it off you change your lifestyle not go on a "diet". You permanently change your eating/exercise habits. A "diet" with serious restriction is what you do to get into a wedding dress, you'll be back up 2 stone in a months time once you stop, which you will because you are hungry and miserable.

As others have said, you're eating way too few calories.

Look at Filling Meals by Lindsay Wilson, there's a book and he's on Instagram. I saw it recommended on here a week or two ago and I think it's really good. The premise (this is for 50 YO inactive women, men, younger or very active women should eat more) is to eat two x 500 calorie high protein, high volume meals (based on eggs, yogurt, oats or cottage cheese plus fruit and veg) earlier in the day and 'a normal dinner' which won't need to be huge as you're full from earlier in the day. This naturally restricts calories so helps lose weight.

Interestingly he says that the vast majority, around 95%, of women burn over 2000 calories a day so will sustainably lose on 1500 or so calories a day and if they cut below their BMR, it will fuck their metabolism. So at odds with MN wisdom that 2000 calories is way too high for the average woman and she would be enormously overweight if she ate such a massive amount of food.

Dieting doesn't have to be this hard. It is difficult but you should eat tasty foods that are low in calorie and high in volume to help satisfy you. Check out recipes on Instagram.

Which are foods I don’t tend to like. I just don’t I’m afraid. I obviously wish I did - life would be far easier if I liked broccoli as much as cake!

As previously said: a BMI of 28 isn't particularly big and thinking you've got loads to lose is a set up for failure as it feels like a mountain.

Best to set yourself an initial target of 5% weight loss - that will make you feel so much better and the process more manageable.

I've been on slimming world and it's a good system. Never go hungry because it just won't work. Fill up on whole foods and don't focus on calories too much, more the TYPE of food you are eating.

And NEVER compare yourself to a man's weight loss.

Dieting extremely like this won't do you any favours. I stopped that in my 20s because I realised it wasn't healthy and I would never stick to it therefore would end up put the weight back on. Are you both trying to lose weight for a special event?

My bmi is 29 and deficit calculator said 1750 for me. I’m doing that alongside a long walk most days and do a small workout at home on YouTube daily too. I’ve lost 10 pounds in the previous two months which may seem slow to some people but I’ve stagnated at the same weight for years, and this feels easy and maintainable. When I’ve tried to be more hardcore in the past I’ve given up spectacularly after about a week.