Why do you hate the PTA?

[Rororo1]

I am part of a group of parents who are in the process of setting up a PTA at our primary school. When I mentioned this to a friend, she went on a long rant about how she dislikes the PTA at her child's school, and I feel like hating on the PTA is a common thing.

If you dislike your schools PTA, please can you tell me why? So we can try to avoid doing whatever it is that seems to make PTA groups so unlikeable 😅

Also please vote:

You are being unreasonable - I have no hard feelings towards the PTA at my child's school

You are not being unreasonable - I have negative feelings towards our PTA

When do your events start? Ours always start at 1530, so not realistic for those who work 9-5.

I'm in the secondary school PTA and I would just say

• all of us work full time /have busy lives. Most of us are a bit flakey as work and family have to come first, but we do our best to muddle along and raise money for schools
• I don't think any of the teachers other than the Headteacher would have any idea who is on the PTA so there's definitely no special treatment for our kids.
• we try and raise money because we see the requests from teachers and know how even small donations can add up to buy things for school that can really make a difference.
• we don't judge anyone for not volunteering, mainly we feel a bit crap that we don't manage to raise more /do more but we are a tiny team and none of us have specialist skills
• we aren't cliquey, we didn't know each other before we joined and most of us joined because we wanted to get to know new people. of course we do chat to each other because we have got to know each other.
• we very much do want new people to join because we can't do everything we would like to do
• we aren't any one "type" of person, I'd say we cover the full spectrum of different types of mum (interestingly no dads ever ask to join)

The PTA I was on didn't get a say on what money was spent on.
We asked the school and everything had to be approved.
Offering PTA money for some large playground equipment was actually turned down because the borough was legally responsible to provide it (which they did).
But we did fund buying some footballs, hulahoops, skipping ropes etc. But we ASKED the school first if that's what they wanted.

I must live in a parallel universe.

The PTA are a group of people - well, mums - who get off their arse and actually do things to raise money for the school.

Events are “boring” and “awkward”? Not really. Would I choose to attend a crammed summer fair to play tombola, no. Do I mind doing so, also no. I’ve even (hold the front page) occasionally had a good time.

The “pressure” of finding something for the tombola - I mean, really? Donate if you want, not if you don’t want.

Yes, they constantly ask for money. Sometimes I participate, sometimes I don’t. I’ve never felt under pressure to join in or donate.

I said that earlier but I think you put it better.

Some of ours were a bit Patty Simcox, others looked like they were begrudgingly doing community service and would rather be in prison. I joined for a bit, it was exhausting. Kudos to them all though, they do make things nicer for the kids!

Our school wouldn’t have a Christmas fayre as it would be exclusionary for a large number of families. They do a winter fayre which is mainly over priced craft stalls and a couple of games.

Also, we don’t have second hand uniform sales and instead have a bring and swap shed that is open at drop off and pick up for parents to use with no judgement.

I wonder if ptas should concentrate more on fundraising from businesses and grants and less on parents who can rarely afford to fund the schools wish list.

A box of mr Kipling cakes for the cake sale could be a good few quid which quite a few parents would have to think twice about.

I would rather just set up a direct debit or annual payment to the school, seems really inefficient.

I don't get this. When I donate to the PTA I definitelydon't expect the money spent on junk food. I assume it's for equipment/books/teaching resources.

I stopped donating to our primary school PTA because they were spaffing most of the money on junk food treats.

Im the secretary of our local primary school PTA.

there are only 7 members and that includes the head teacher and another class teacher. We all work full time (I run my own business), and we are honestly there to make the head teachers life easier. She’s a lovely lady who wants the best for the children, the school is very underfunded and our fundraising helps pay for things she asks for; including sport equipment, computers, books, gazebos and added extras that make the school experience more fun for the kids.

its very sad that there are people out there on a power trip from being on a PTA, we don’t get things right all the time but we certainly don’t exclude anyone

I always think people who hate the PTA don’t really get how much schools need the money from the PTA.

i work in a school in quire a middle class area… lots of middle class families but also a number of families in extreme poverty.

Our PTA are excellent, probably because the committee is made up of middle class lawyers accountants and business people who have chosen either to take time off or who have chosen to do work for the PTA as well as their work ( that is almost always the treasurers).

We have recently had a regime change and I’ll definitely suggest that we offer parents the chance to donate a sum, any sum , at the beginning of the year if that will help them not feel bothered by requests throughout the year.

However our PTA have been amazing.

Some things that parents have funded that they will probably never see

Fixing the reading books - they have replaced all the ones that were “lost” over tge last 5 years and the ones where “my water bottle leaked”. So many many reading books are list and destroyed every year because pupils and parents simply don’t respect them.

Paying for the Accelerated Reader subscription. This encourages children to read and improves literacy but the subscription costs approx £4K

13 packs of the Crayola “Colours Of The World” multi ethnic skin tone coloured pencils - only about £120 but now every child in every class can colour pictures with children of their skin tone

So many pencils. We in Scotland have the “cost of the school day” policy where it must not cost families a penny to come to school. So school must be able to provide everything from free uniforms to those who need it, to free winter coats, waterproof outdoor wear, shoes, spare underwear, wellies, pencils, pens, rubbers… in Scotland pupils must be able to turn up and take part in every aspect of the curriculum without spending a single penny. That means the parent council need to pay for a massive amount of spare clothes, coats, waterproofs and outdoor shoes. Yes most families send their children to school with these things but we must provide everything for those who can’t or don’t.

pencils, rubbers sharpeners, felt pens, coloured pencils and everything are supplied by the parent council - we cannot ask parents to send children in with filled pencil cases because a number of families can’t

Glue Sticks. The pupil council could buy 4933953 and it would never be enough.

pretty things like craft feathers, tissue paper and pom-poms - no budgets to buy them so, the parent council

I love our parent council so much - they fund so much but I’ll definitely suggest a “one time payment per year then please don’t feel guilty “ payment

@FurForksSake a box of Mr Kipling cakes are often about £1.
Yes for some families sadly that extra £1 is just not doable but many families can easily afford that.

The ROI for PTA activities is horrendous and makes me incredibly cross. It’s incredibly poor planning but they all pat themselves on the pack for how much money they’ve raised. They’d be better off shaking a tin.

It's more for the kids than for you, I think

I think far fewer parents wet themselves with excitement at the prospect of a school fete than the average PTA understands. If it didn’t happen it would just be one fewer thing to feel pressured to fit into an already busy (and probably rainy) weekend with cranky children.

I would give a generous monthly sustaining donation to the school if they could promise I would never again be mugged at the school gate and hassled about the understaffed facepainting stand or the need for me to prepare a gluten and nut free dish from my home country for World Cuisines Day or whatnot.

I would give generously to a library fund or a sports fund or a SEND fund or bursary for school trips for kids who need it, and I’d be even happier if I felt the school’s fundraising efforts were even vaguely efficient - but they’re not, they’re bogged down by all these extra commitments of time and faff and events my DC always hates anyway and refuses to go to, not to mention the endless texts and emails and miserable pass agg complaints about how shit and selfish we all are.

We 'd love someone to join our PTA to focus on grant applications from business. You would be welcomed with open arms if you volunteered to do that here.

Forgot quote.

I give my PTA £1 a day via bank transfer btw. So
much more efficient.

PTAs should be registered as a charity and have a dedicated bank account so you could just donate if you want too.

Yes, this resonates.

I have two kids in primary. I don’t hate the PTA, in fact I used to have the utmost respect for them and for a few years I volunteered for everything I could, work / children permitting. However in the last year or so I’ve become disillusioned. All the events that they claim to organise, but take the cake sales for example, all the PTA do is print off a poster, parents bake the cakes and most of the time none of the PTA show up. No effort is made to organise the volunteers so a few people show up and don’t know what they are supposed to be doing. People need to feel useful, given a job to do but every time I’ve helped out it’s just always so chaotic. It would not be that difficult to have one PTA member available for one small event, for them to show up a few minutes early and introduce themselves, chat with the volunteers etc and give them clear instruction on what they need to do.

I’ve volunteered for so many things and I doubt any of the PTA members know my name. They are also not transparent about where the money goes, even though it is a successful venture and raises thousands a year. And they complain about not having enough volunteers.

The final straw was earlier this year I was organising something school related for a whole year group. I emailed the PTA asking if they would consider contributing if there was a family who couldn’t afford it. I wouldn’t have minded if they had said no but my email got totally ignored.

I know the school have a wish list of books, but the PTA don’t appear to be contributing anything to this.

I won’t be volunteering for anything else in a hurry and if there aren’t enough volunteers then, oh well, where’s the money going anyway?

Most of the children love it.

I don’t have the PTA. In my child’s old school they were a certain type of person that I don’t love - very loud, cliquey, nosey, sucked up to the head and yes they were constantly trying to extract money from me through stealth. It was tiring however i know it’s probably important. Much less visible in my child’s new (tiny) school.

Our primary school doesn’t even have one….

I dont know about other PTAs but we are generally well aware of that but the HT view is that the events are an important aspect of creating a school "community".
We have raised the idea of inviting people to set up standing orders instead but he seems reluctant. And actually I am not sure how that would be received.

So instead of sneering at us like we are idiots how about recognising that many PtAs are well aware of that fact and that the wish for "events" is as much driven by the school.

I bought two boxes today and on Clubcard price they were nearly £2 each. Without club card it was silly. Yes, you could donate one of the big trays of cheaply iced fairy cakes but I think a lot would feel that actually they aren’t a contribution people want.

I work in schools (for the nhs). I cannot tell you how poor so many of the families are. Money for extras just isn’t there and it’s awful. And that’s just for a contribution without attending the cake sale / fayre or whatever and paying out more. It’s a real source of worry for a number of parents that their child will feel or look different as they just can’t attend.