Why do you hate the PTA?

[Rororo1]

I am part of a group of parents who are in the process of setting up a PTA at our primary school. When I mentioned this to a friend, she went on a long rant about how she dislikes the PTA at her child's school, and I feel like hating on the PTA is a common thing.

If you dislike your schools PTA, please can you tell me why? So we can try to avoid doing whatever it is that seems to make PTA groups so unlikeable 😅

Also please vote:

You are being unreasonable - I have no hard feelings towards the PTA at my child's school

You are not being unreasonable - I have negative feelings towards our PTA

I'm really grateful for our PTA, it's a lot of hard work for little reward. I think they're a little out of touch with the pressures of working parents though as they held all of the events in the last two weeks of term which has been really overwhelming for taking time off etc.

It’s also about trying to build a sense of community around the school, and yes it’s mostly for the children and not the parents. My older kids remember their primary school fair very fondly.

I’ve dipped in and out of the PTA over the years and have seen the massive benefit it provides. We’ve raised thousands for electronic whiteboards, iPads, outdoor play equipment, bike racks etc. all of which improve the school experience for the children.

I know people are busy and it’s another thing to remember, and that occasionally there will be over zealous people joining, but mostly the intent is good.

lol yes, I had an idea and rather than being a dick and moaning I joined the PTA so I could do it.

I don't hate our PTA, but generally ignore them. I don't join because I'm always on the fringes and get the crap jobs, and no one listens to me. It's too hard.

We have a relatively new group, who do irritating fund raisers like colour runs, where the kids get prizes for how much they raise, so pressure you to contribute more or annoy everyone you know to contribute.

Not sure what they do with the money. A few kids out together a cause for a water fountain in the hall and PTA said yes. It's been two years & still waiting.....

This .100%

My child was often left out of PTA events because she has allergies. Donut sale - all were may contain nuts, cake sale every half term, Easter eggs, even when seeing Santa at the Christmas fair she was given a chocolate Santa that said may contain nuts. Yes I did tell them and yes I did start providing things she could eat, but tbh it pissed me off that she'd been excluded in the first place. What makes me laugh is that every year the school wins and proudly displays a Healthy Schools Award, yet most of the fundraising is based on selling copious amounts of sugar.

I had a terrible experience of a PTA. They wanted to raise money to buy a defib, I told them I could get them one for free provided it was accessible by the community, would have cost £500 to run the relevant electric cable. They decided they wanted their own defib, not for public use. This was 2 years ago, I left the PTA, they still don't have a defib. Ridiculous.
I also suggested that we just ask parents, absolutely no pressure, if they would like to set up a DD for £10 a month to the PTA (it's a reasonably well off area). They were horrified at that. I then realised they just wanted busy work, to make themselves important.
It was an absolute farce and I just don't have time for that shit.

This has been my experience of PTA members as well. I was more than happy to volunteer and help out, but the woman on the PTA are so rude and unfriendly, I won't be volunteering again. They also send out emails about lack of volunteers etc - not surprised if they treat everyone the same way. I can usually get along with most people and can make small talk quite comfortably

YABU- our PSA are lovely, they organise the winning house’s end of year treat and various raffles and competitions which make school more fun for the children. It is kind of them to give up their time.

As a parent governor, I am also grateful for the money they raise. This money benefits the children in many ways. It can be used to offset trip costs, buy new books, etc. Our school serves a disadvantaged community, so likewise the second hand uniform sales the PSA organises directly benefits families struggling to pay for new branded uniform items.

I don’t hate our PTA, they raise money to help with an under funded primary school.

What I do struggle with is that it’s basically just non-uniform day in one guise or another…normally themed which means spending more money!

They also won’t collect cash so a lot of people forget to pay their pound on ParentPay.

I am hoping to be more involved this year though so I’m hoping to put some ideas forward

This was my experience too!

Exactly, and they can't even sell it for what it's worth.

So you spend £5 on a Baylis and Harding set which was the only thing you could find in the nearest supermarket at 9:30pm, the school sells it to your child for £3, Tesco Express gets £5, the PTA gets £3 and you get to smell like Candy Apple Kisses and Peppermint Wishes. I could have just given £5 to the PTA. But then, my daughter would not have the joy of proudly presenting me with her inexpertly wrapped gift that she lovingly selected from all the other Baylis and Harding toiletry sets because she knows I like Toffee Apples. So I do appreciate them, most of the time.

At my school we struggled for volunteers so the pta closed down for 2 years. This meant no Easter disco, year 6 pizza party, yr 6 sleep over, summer fayre, Santas grotto and Christmas party. I’ve been on the pta but it was run by a very toxic lady. She wanted me to be flexible and more available than I could be, my husband worked shifts and I had 2 young children. She couldn’t accept some help for some events. She wanted all or nothing from volunteers. I ended up leaving then it folded the year later. It was back up and running a few years later and seemed to be managed by a lovely group of mums and dads.

I have no idea of the circumstances, but I know that there couldn't possibly have anything accessible "by the community". If it was, then it would have nothing to do with the school, because it couldn't be on school ground or property.
It's not the job of the PTA to raise money for the community (why they want a defib in the first place, I wouldn't know 😂)

I'd have much preferred an opt-out fee. I'll pay £100 a year and then I don't have to volunteer or donate to the individual fundraisers.

Does the PTA stand in a designated square at pickup with a sign saying ‘PTA only’? Because my child is starting year 2 and I have no idea which parents form the PTA, not one. I just pay what is asked as I’m grateful for any time they give

Over the last 20 years I have given massive amounts of time, as a volunteer, for a uniformed organisation. The group I previously worked with (I moved to a different town so I moved groups) drew its members almost entirely from two primary schools and they both always held their discos on the night of the week we met. As often as not one would have a Halloween disco the week before Halloween and the other would have it the week after so we were missing half the members two weeks running.
I contacted the PTA in the school my DC attended and asked whether they would consider not always holding discos on the same night of the week every time because it was affecting my group and other groups in the area, and the response was that that was the night that suited the committee. One of my team had a DC at the other local school. She pointed out to that PTA that they were always crying out for volunteers and if they rotated the night of the week they held discos, different parents would be available to volunteer, her included; she received a similar response to the one I received.
I supported the PTA where I could because their effort paid for a lot of extras in the school (panto at Christmas in the school, contributions for buses for trips, treats at sports day, etc) but they were a clique who weren't willing to accommodate the wider community.

Oh this was my experience too. It put me off completely.

It find it annoying how I'm taxed and barely just financially surviving, yet every week the PTA hands are out asking for money. I blame the government. But I do think some of the money is wasted a little on copious amounts of ice cream on what feels like every time the sun comes out on a Friday and treats that are relatively cheap that most kids have at home. I don't mind if the money is supporting things that are needed or that would make more positive change. I don't remember having ice cream at school yet never felt like we did without.

The committee are volunteers, of course it had to be on a night they are available to help. What a weird thing to be angry at them about. We also often get told by the school what night /time we can hold events as it depends on the availability of the site team etc

The PSA at my DD's school was really great too. IT depends so much on the crowd running it - luckily ours had some great ideas for fund raising and bought some great things and eventually raised enough for a complete playground revamp!

This.

My PTA are worried about asking for donations because they are afraid parents may get upset by the request. Having seen the weirdly ill placed vitriol on this thread (I hate the PTA because they didn't move the date of the disco to a date I preferred etc) I can see why they were nervous

Also part of our remit is to deliver "events " for the school. That's not an ego trip. It's what the HT asks us to provide.

And re the defib- I can see all kinds of potential headaches with the arrangement you wanted so again, weird thing to judge them for

So the compromise would have been it would have been placed on the gatepost, outside the school, accesable by the school and the community. It would have worked beautifully, but they didn't want it... goodness knows why.
They'd had a grandparent picking up a dc who had an MI on school grounds previously so decided a deifb was needed.

This, sooo this. There is always 1 top dog who is a megalomaniac 😂. My ndn is in her kids schools one and oh my gosh, some of them are absolute fannies. However, they do endeavour to raise a lot of money for the greater good.
Hope that helps😂