This - I have very severe combined ADHD (with an NHS diagnosis). I hold down a high-pressure job (though I usually have to move every few years to avoid ADHD complacency) and I run a household but no-one sees the cost of doing that. When you’ve spent over an hour sat on the floor dissociated in the shower because you’ve burned out juggling what is perfectly fine for most people, you understand.
There are plenty of people who are dismissive (and I find it in younger as well as older people - I’m in my 40s, @dizzydizzydizzy). I’ve had people say that it’s a mental health condition (nope, it’s a neurological condition, world of difference), that you just need coping mechanisms, that everyone is a bit ADHD but you just need to pull your socks up. I don’t think people understand that there is a biochemical process in the brain that literally does not work properly in people with ADHD. It’s not that they’re not trying hard enough or that they’re undisciplined - their brain literally cannot do what others can without a massive strain on resources and a host of coping mechanisms.
I compare it to when your leg goes to sleep if you’ve been sat too long on the loo, say. You get pins and needles, you can’t move your leg or put weight on it. In no way does that mean you are a ‘little bit lame’ or that disabled people should just get a move on and wake their legs up. Just saying that would be completely outrageous and indeed ridiculous. The difference between having ADHD and being NT but having the odd scatty or unmotivated day, is the same.
I’ve considered claiming PIP in the past because my ADHD tax is so severe. But I keep forgetting to call up for the form. It’s been five years now 😂 Believe me, the number of people who would claim for ADHD if they actually had the ability to focus long enough to actually jump through the hoops would be insane 😂