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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU after being reported for apparently targeting a member of staff

503 replies

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:25

OK no one is going to believe this to be true but I need to share it. I was spoken to today by my line manager as I've been reported in our 'call it out' policy. I made a member of staff feel targeted and picked on.
I bet you won't be able to guess what I did that made them feel so bad.
It's so crackers I actually thought my manager was joking.
Anyone want to guess?

OP posts:
Owly11 · 05/07/2026 21:38

I like your dress/shirt/whatever

Secretsquirrelshh · 05/07/2026 21:38

Ate a cake in front of them while they were trying to lose weight?

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:39

When I said I laughed it was not in a mocking way or derogatory at all, it was more an incredulous one

OP posts:
SardinesOnButteredToast · 05/07/2026 21:40

IdentifyingAsAWoollyMammoth · 05/07/2026 21:31

Just. Tell. Us. We're not four year olds in a guessing game.

You sent an email in Gen Z speak, Capitalising. Each. Word. And. Using. Copious. Full. Stops in a tedious manner?

SardinesOnButteredToast · 05/07/2026 21:40

IdentifyingAsAWoollyMammoth · 05/07/2026 21:31

Just. Tell. Us. We're not four year olds in a guessing game.

You sent an email in Gen Z speak, Capitalising. Each. Word. And. Using. Copious. Full. Stops in a tedious manner?

HelpMeGetThrough · 05/07/2026 21:40

Was really irritating by acting like a primary school kid, wanting adults to play stupid guessing game.

Asuperblyfeauturedroomandexcellentboiledpotatoes · 05/07/2026 21:41

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:37

During a coffee break, another staff member said they thought Taylor Swifts wedding was over the top and a bit ridiculous. I said "yeah I agree" the complainer said it was to keep it private and I laughed and said "in madison square garden" the other staff member said he didn't get the hype over taylor swift and I said I didn't either. End of conversation.
Apparently this deeplynupset the complainer as they love taylor swift and they felt mocked.

Well how the fuck were we supposed to guess that?

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:42

Asuperblyfeauturedroomandexcellentboiledpotatoes · 05/07/2026 21:41

Well how the fuck were we supposed to guess that?

Exactly!

OP posts:
Owly11 · 05/07/2026 21:43

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:37

During a coffee break, another staff member said they thought Taylor Swifts wedding was over the top and a bit ridiculous. I said "yeah I agree" the complainer said it was to keep it private and I laughed and said "in madison square garden" the other staff member said he didn't get the hype over taylor swift and I said I didn't either. End of conversation.
Apparently this deeplynupset the complainer as they love taylor swift and they felt mocked.

It sounds like you did take sides in the argument. If you are older perhaps they see you as having more power in the organisation. It's obviously ridiculous of them to report you but I can see how it might have felt to them that you were dismissive of one person's view and supportive of the other.

Sunshineandoranges · 05/07/2026 21:43

Id have said they now made me feel awkward and id find it hard to socialise with them thus they have created tension in the workplace.

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:43

HelpMeGetThrough · 05/07/2026 21:40

Was really irritating by acting like a primary school kid, wanting adults to play stupid guessing game.

A stupid guessing game that you joined in with 🤣

OP posts:
Gengha · 05/07/2026 21:44

I hope the manager told them to get a grip!

HelpMeGetThrough · 05/07/2026 21:44

Well that was a load of Sunday night shite.

PocketBattleship · 05/07/2026 21:44

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:37

During a coffee break, another staff member said they thought Taylor Swifts wedding was over the top and a bit ridiculous. I said "yeah I agree" the complainer said it was to keep it private and I laughed and said "in madison square garden" the other staff member said he didn't get the hype over taylor swift and I said I didn't either. End of conversation.
Apparently this deeplynupset the complainer as they love taylor swift and they felt mocked.

And to think that generation get accused of snowflakery.

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:44

Owly11 · 05/07/2026 21:43

It sounds like you did take sides in the argument. If you are older perhaps they see you as having more power in the organisation. It's obviously ridiculous of them to report you but I can see how it might have felt to them that you were dismissive of one person's view and supportive of the other.

No it wasn't like that at all. I don't have more power. I was boiling the kettle, other worker sitting down with complainer (no idea they liked TS)

OP posts:
Gengha · 05/07/2026 21:45

Owly11 · 05/07/2026 21:43

It sounds like you did take sides in the argument. If you are older perhaps they see you as having more power in the organisation. It's obviously ridiculous of them to report you but I can see how it might have felt to them that you were dismissive of one person's view and supportive of the other.

It wasn’t an argument by sounds of it. It was a bit of chat about an event that’s been high profile in the media. It wasn’t even critical of TS as a person.

HelpMeGetThrough · 05/07/2026 21:45

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:43

A stupid guessing game that you joined in with 🤣

Welk, I did exactly guess did I, just made a comment.

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:46

HelpMeGetThrough · 05/07/2026 21:44

Well that was a load of Sunday night shite.

I wish it was. Luckily my manager is a common sense sort and had dealt with both of us very professionally

OP posts:
KeepPumping · 05/07/2026 21:46

Timeforabiscuit · 05/07/2026 21:28

Talked to them stood up, while they were sat in a chair?

Talked to them stood up while they were sat on the toilet?

PenelopeJoanSterling · 05/07/2026 21:47

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:46

I wish it was. Luckily my manager is a common sense sort and had dealt with both of us very professionally

but what did they want to achive by it ?

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:47

Gengha · 05/07/2026 21:45

It wasn’t an argument by sounds of it. It was a bit of chat about an event that’s been high profile in the media. It wasn’t even critical of TS as a person.

It really wasn't an argument at all. It was at the same stakes as "have you seen this film" "no I don't like horror films"

OP posts:
CheekyPombear · 05/07/2026 21:47

Didnt give them a birthday card?

KeepPumping · 05/07/2026 21:48

GeishaTrumpet · 05/07/2026 21:31

You looked at them funny?

Then asked them their age.

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:48

HelpMeGetThrough · 05/07/2026 21:45

Welk, I did exactly guess did I, just made a comment.

🤣

OP posts:
Kalanthe · 05/07/2026 21:48

Vintageshirtsearch · 05/07/2026 21:37

During a coffee break, another staff member said they thought Taylor Swifts wedding was over the top and a bit ridiculous. I said "yeah I agree" the complainer said it was to keep it private and I laughed and said "in madison square garden" the other staff member said he didn't get the hype over taylor swift and I said I didn't either. End of conversation.
Apparently this deeplynupset the complainer as they love taylor swift and they felt mocked.

How were we supposed to have guessed something so specific 😂😂😂

Obviously it's ridiculous and the person reprimanding you knew this, but they have to follow the company policy. Next time be careful what you say and keep strong opinions to yourself if you work with snowflakes. Break chat is nice but work colleagues are not your friends, anything you say can backfire against you

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