Should I dump my boyfriend because he won't stop eating crisps?

[Spicyseniorita7]

I'm in a relatively new relationship (7 months) after over 2 years of being single with some dating disasters along the way. Everything seems great on paper, he is kind, has a good job that pays well, not bad looking, treats me well and never allows me to pay for anything. For context, I am 28F and he is 32M- we both live separately at present. I would like to settle down soon.

I'm unsure if I am self-sabotaging, but some of his eating/snacking habits disgust me, to the point that I think I've developed the ick. This came to light properly on our recent 2 week holiday-prior to this, the longest we had spent together was about 3 days. He eats at least 3 packets of crisps per day and not the sophisticated type i.e kettle chips, think more Skips/monster munch/Nik naks/cheesy wotsits/space raiders. He doesn't wash his hands after eating the crisps and requires prompting to do so. This often results in him having disgusting synthetic crisp dust all over his fingers and fingernails.

Even more disgustingly, after he's finished with a packet, he arches back his head and empties the remnants of the crisp crumbs into his mouth. It's almost as though he cannot bear for a single scrap to be wasted. But the most disgusting is sometimes, after finishing a packet, he will blow up the packet like a balloon and pop it. This has resulted in me being sprayed with crumbs. I've also found scrunched up crisp packets wedged behind his bed, almost as though he can't be bothered to walk to the bin.

We recently went on holiday to Spain and it was mortifying-he didn't try any local food and just wanted to eat British food, McDonald's and crisps. We went to the supermarket and he loaded up the trolley with crisps. I haven't said anything yet, he is keen to start looking for a flat to rent together, but I just can't help but thinking I would prefer a man who doesn't eat over 3 packets of crisps a day and doesn't smell like pickled onion Monster Munch or cheesy wotsits. Is eating all of those crisps a dumpable offence?

Is this a joke post?

Haha, no I'm male. And no, women definitely aren't perfect.

Side eyes the 3 million bits of hard foot skin that DP has peeled off and left on her bedside rug for me to hoover up

Yeah defo a comedy post. No ones that picky or if they are they wouldnt come on here and advertise it to the world.

The part about him blowing up the packet to pop it and covering you in crisp crumbs admittedly made me laugh harder than I’ve laughed at anything on mumsnet for a long time 😂

I’d definitely get the ick from this too, OP!

I would wait more to move in together, it's only 7 months and he's starting to give you the ick... This ick will only get much worse once you start sharing the same space. I would let this relationship progress a bit more before moving in together. In the meanwhile I would let him know that you find his crisp hobby gross. If you're the health conscious type and he's a junk food lover this is going to be a big issue. At 7month s you're still in honeymoon stage and he's already giving you the ick.

I'm thinking that if these habits are giving you the ick so soon on the relationship, its doomed.
You don't even live together so I'm prepared to bet you have a few more nasty surprises to come.
Honestly, have you never blown up a crisp packet and popped it, its brilliant.

Oh god no - you cannot live with this.

Besides the bad manners, if he is that rigid with eating, and can't tolerate unfamiliar foods, you will have other unwelcome surprises in store.

FFS

Wow... You're not a marriage material!!!

Male, married 48 years.
I’m not that bad. But if there are crunchy chip type items on the dinner table dear wife keeps them on the far side of the table and serves them sparingly. Also, if I were to commit any of the grossly rude actions of the op’s boyfriend, I would hear from her immediately (and deservedly so).

Am quoting this as I completely agree. Part of travelling to another place is trying new food and not eating the same shite you can find in any shop back home. I love going to supermarkets abroad for this very reason.

I also suspect poor dental hygiene is a factor in all this. Your boyfriends mouth shouldn’t be smelling that bad after a packet or three of crisps unless he’s not brushing and flossing properly 2/3 times per day.

Before I even saw you later update, I knew immediately that the least of your worries will be the crisp habit if you move in together.

i would have deduced immediately that he doesn’t know how to adult. If you move in together you will find he is incapable of using any household appliances. So he will not be cleaning up after himself and you will soon be in that stereotypical situation of being fed up running the house single handedly.

he is stuck in a childhood loop due to terrible parenting and god help the woman who moves in with him. Be warned.

this can be addressed through counselling but it sounds like he is oblivious to the issue so he is no where near ready to change. Throw this one back and find a man who likes to cook and is house proud.

Good luck!

You sound like a right pain in the arse. It’s only crisps, FFS! He’s better off without you.

You sound absolutely awful.

Honestly if man treats you well and is kind.
Is a few snacks worth throwing something good away.
There are a lot worse habits to deal with

If he has tipped all the crumbs from the crisp packet into his mouth already, how come there are any left in there to spray over you when he blows it up like a balloon and pops it? Ha! Methinks you’re exaggerating.

Can't tell if this is serious or not, but on the off chance that it is, crisps are greasy and there are always crumbs stuck on the inside even after someone does that revolting head tip to "drink" them.

What surprises? I’m very rigid with food for reasons I’ve already outlined.
What other assumptions would you be making about me? Why don’t I deserve to be in a relationship?

I wouldn’t be bothered about eating the crisps although it’s an unhealthy choice, my DH used to tip back the packet too! The non-washing of hands and crisp dust is grim though. I used to be partial to a monster munch and Quavers back in the day so if you’re not bothered about the UPF aspect then it’s not an issue to enjoy these types of snack.

However, the eating McDs on holiday in Spain is bonkers - there’s so many different types of cuisine - you don’t need a full English! Go for pizza, fish, salad etc. You don’t need to even eat typically Spanish food.

Agree

You don't have to be in a relationship with anyone you don't want to be in a relationship with.

This isn't about crisps or what he eats on holiday. This is about basic compatibility and real, unconditional love.

If something someone is doing disgusts you so much you're posting online about it, you are not compatible and you don't feel unconditional love. That's not a great basis for settling down and building a family.

You don't have to like 100% of everything a partner does or likes, but you do have to like that it makes them happy.

Find someone who aligns with you on the things that are important to you.

Your boyfriend sounds lovely (although not my cup of tea either), so let him go and find someone who feels the same way about crisps and foreign food.

Tell him you’re breaking up with him for it and if he doesn’t change then that’s that. Sounds like he would have been a smoker in another era. Maybe un medicated ADHD. You’re 28 and free if this isn’t it for you get out while you can

You'll never meet someone who aligns with you in every single way. You're very early into this relationship, if you both care for each other your tastes and habits will change as you adjust to being together. Have you actually told him you find this revolting? If he wants to stay withyou, he'll change, if you don't matter to him he won't bother. Just don't expect it to stop overnight

@MickyMoonshine I'm not making any assumptions about you - I was responding to the OP.

Nobody 'deserves' to be in a relationship. Whether a relationship develops or not depends on what we have to offer others and what they have to offer us - whether the two partners are complementary.

People who have fixed rules/habits over what and how they eat will still be compatible with many potential partners. But not others.

I agree but you said there would be other unwelcome surprises, I was interested as to what you think those would be?