The support thread for those trying to lead an alcohol free life - Summer 2026

[Lavrander]

Hello and welcome!
This thread is for anyone who is trying to live an alcohol-free life. It was first set up by @drybird and has grown into a safe, supportive space to share thoughts, ask advice, swap experiences, or simply check in as we give up and keep off the booze.
There’s no judgment here – just encouragement. Whether you post every day, once in a while, or just read along quietly, you’re part of the group. Many of us have found this thread invaluable, whether brand new to abstaining or years into AF life.
Wherever you are on the journey, someone here will have been there too. Don’t be shy about posting – we love celebrating successes of all shapes and sizes, and we’ll support you through the tougher times as well.
The only thing we ask is that your aim is complete abstinence. If your goal is moderation or a break, there are a couple of really good threads on this board that will be a better fit. That doesn't mean that slips don't happen, and we'll support you in picking yourself back up and carrying on.
So climb aboard and join the shipmates (as well as our dog mascot Sid!) and see how good alcohol free life can be.

Morning all.

Too right @WendyWagon. The drink wouldn't have helped, even if it feels like it might, it's a lie. Hope today is better.

Good morning shipmates,

Hang on in there @WendyWagon - much kudos for not resorting to the booze. We know it wouldn't help. The issues would still be there - only, then, they'd be there PLUS a hangover and the guilt.

Sid is attracting new followers on his early morning cool walks. There are two elderly ladies who seek him out, armed with treats. This morning, another one came rushing out from her house with a handful of treats, having spotted him in the lane from an upper window. Sid is shameless; he flirts and simpers for his rewards, as he knows he must. He's like his predecessor - she could effortlessly persuade many an elderly lady on the bus to part with the contents of her tartan wheeled shopper, and be grateful for the opportunity. For this new acolyte, Sid rolled over and presented full chest and belly for rubs, in between his mouthfuls of Jumbone Tasty Minis, to squeals of delight from his new admirer. Shameless. If any shipmates are keeping any meat - specifically chops - in their cabins, might I suggest the purchase of a small, sturdy padlock, available from the Purser's office? Just in case.

This is the face Sid presents to his ladies. The "she never feeds me" face. Shameless.

Strength and courage. xx

I always have a ready supply of treats for my grandpuppies' visits, so be sure to tell Sid that if he's passing Ellen Towers he's welcome to pop in for a Bonio and a cuddle any time. Who could resist his lovely self?

Not much going on here. Life's a bit 'one foot in front of the other' just now, but I'm hoping for better times to come, which is all we can do, really.

Chins up, shipmates!

I'm upstairs lads and it's been an awful day.
I'm away from the grog and safe.

Sending love @ShyMaryEllen - I was thinking about you yesterday evening, hoping you were OK. And @WendyWagon ; sorry it's been another grim one.

Much love from us both and especial wags from Sidney. xx

Thank you @REP22

Can I come onboard? Day 30 sober. I promised myself that I'd join this group if I got this far.

I've tried and failed to moderate and got to the point where I was miserable every day I wasn't drinking. A glass of wine always leading to finishing the bottle, then beating myself up. I'm fit and healthy with a good marriage and loving family. No childhood trauma or stress - happily retired. I'm active and take care to eat healthy. But I couldn't drink sensibly.

Fortunately, someone recommended The Naked Mind by Annie Grace. I downloaded the book to my kindle and it helped me reframe my thoughts.

I haven't been alcohol free for more than 4 days since my last pregnancy, 30 years ago. To be 30 days sober makes me incredibly proud of myself. I've started The Alcohol Experiment to reinforce the learning.

I haven't told anyone IRL that I plan to be alcohol free for the rest of my life. It's been hard enough saying I'm taking a break for a month! Family gatherings always involves alcohol.

My husband drinks over a bottle of red wine every day and sees no reason to stop or cut down. He's been surprisingly supportive so far. I'm hoping he might be inspired by my success!

It's very encouraging to read about people achieving milestones. I hope to post a few of my own.

Welcome @ColdFeetat60 and well done on your 30 days! That is a great start, and you’ve definitely done the hardest bit (although swimming against the tide of alcohol being everywhere can feel a bit of a drag - but definitely worth it)

@ColdFeetat60 welcome x the first 30 days is such an achievement it’s definitely one of the hardest bits.
My husband now hasn’t had a drink in months, I would never have believed it, I didn’t make any comment on his drinking, I think he just noticed the positive changes in me and he sort of tagged along. We’re about to go on holiday so will see how it goes but our lives have changed a lot.
I gave myself the target of a year without booze but I can’t see myself ever having another drink now. It’s just not my friend anymore :)

@FiloPasty it's good to hear success stories. If my husband could stop drinking I think it would change his whole outlook. Fingers crossed.

Morning shipmates

Welcome aboard @ColdFeetat60and well done for the first 30 days. I really liked the alcohol experiment. I did all the exercises in a little note pad on my phone and still have them. Really interested to hear how you're finding it.

@Lavrander I'm enjoying it, partly because I've already done 30 days so feel like a winner already. It's interesting to think back and remember the mental hill I was climbing and know I made it. I feel so much more confident now and working through the book is keeping me motivated. I particularly like the analogy of the child in the back seat of the car trying to convince me to buy ice cream when I've said no and meant it - only to cave 10 minutes later!

I'm writing my thoughts in a notebook, but plan to fire up my old laptop and type them up.

Morning all.
Welcome @ColdFeetat60
We're a supportive lot. Thirty days is such an achievement. I read somewhere recently that 50% of alcohol dependency is routed in childhood trauma but of course that means 50% isn't. I had a wonderful dad and younger brother. The rest not so good.
However I did marry a lovely man and I'm very proud of my adult DC.

Sometimes we like food and wine a bit too much. Mind you after abstainance the grog tastes like old socks! I gave up cheese too. The crisps I limit.

The dog and I have had our breakfast.
I'm off to see a bungalow to rent today just in case the cottage is not going to happen.
I couldn't buy it anyway as it's part of an estate so I wouldn't get pressure from friends who think I need Derry Boots and a Zimmer! They love them, I don't, but needs must.

Good morning shipmates,

Hearty welcome @ColdFeetat60 from me and Cabin Boy/Powder Monkey Sid. I am glad you've found us. To be at 30 days already is fantastic! It's so hard, but so very worth it.

Sid was curiously eager to help water up last night. It transpired that Parsnip, his feline nemesis, was cooling off in the borders. M has departed on a coffin-dodgers' coach tour holiday, hence the uncharacteristic gardening activity. Sid beat a hasty retreat when the watering can appeared, so Parsnip remained unmolested once more. Stay safe in the heat brave friends.

Strength and courage. It will be alright. xx

Thanks everyone for the warm welcome. It feels good to be on board.

@REP22 I can't DM you as I've got this daft app.

Oh that's annoying. Will DM you to see if that sparks anything app-wise.

Welcome @ColdFeetat60
Huge well done on 30 days! You’ve done the hardest part physically. My top tips would be (not the best I admit ) keep doing the work.
Be kind to yourself. Habits are established neural pathways and you need to rebuild those pathways (they really exist) and learn / create new ones.
You have nothing to “blur the edges” now, so learn new ways of relaxing ready for when you need them. When those triggers hit have a tool kit ready.
I don’t make any plans for other than today re alcohol. No worrying about “what will I do Friday or Christmas or that holiday”. Just today.
Today I will not drink with you xx
I’ve just created a picture for you (if it loads) and that’s what I imagine in my head it really helped x

Love that picture @mumzof4x - it's a very accurate depiction of what I have in my mind as well (though without flatulent canine sidekick). Brilliant. x

Welcome @ColdFeetat60 and well done for 30+ days so far.

Thank you for the photo collage @mumzof4x

Wow, thank you @mumzof4x . The more pictures in my head the better.

Thinking of alcohol as a toxic poison has helped me a lot. How my body has to work so hard to undo the damage. I don't want to put flavoured poison in my system ever again.

My mission is to find a drink that can become my go-to, instead of red wine. I want to avoid sugar and sugar substitutes in the long run, but at the moment I'm being flexible. I've been drinking kombucha, fizzy water with cordial and some AF red wine and AF beer. They are ok, but there's room for improvement.

I find it works for me to have drinks I only drink in the evenings. They've become my 'wine' equivalent - a way of separating day from evening. I drank AF fizz for years, but it's very sugary, so have moved to tins of 0% G&T or Fevertree Italian Spritz or Ginger Beer. In a gin glass with ice and lemon they almost pass for the real thing. Opening a 'special' drink after 7.00pm deals with the habit side of things and stops me feeling deprived.

Same here @ShyMaryEllenalthough I seem to have become obsessed with tea!
Like the de alcoholised white and rose in Aldi and it’s only £3 or there about.
Also goodrays and trip they really do seem to chill me out but I think that’s more because I now associate pouring one with “time to relax”. Lovely cold in a champagne glass. Very fizzy if you like that but costly.
Aldi do a great knock off fever tree too. Great with AF Rhubarb and Ginger Gin.

Morning all.
Off to London for the big fashion lunch. AF options are available.
I hate the heat so my clothes options are curtailed. Frock time I think.

I saw the bungalow yesterday, very expensive and a small master bedroom. It's also isolated and that's not healthy for me or the DD.
Back to the period flat I think.

Thanks for the tips.