To think the younger MN generation would be shocked at things we did decades ago...

[Allonthesametrain]

It was such a different time, before the days of hand gel, smartphones, ordering online, house cctv, awareness etc.

This is from a background of a good home with values, DF worked hard, DM did everything for us 3 DC and also worked early before we got up and during school hours when we of that age.

Things we would do...

All 3 have a bath together every night when young, also go into after bath DF or DM.

Most clothes were hand me downs/passed on from friends and neighbours and anything new was for a special occasion.

If we wanted anything special we had to wait until Christmas or birthdays and were delighted and grateful

Lucky to have a house phone, it was in the hall way so no privacy and a shout how long are you going to be on there if you rang out

Bedrooms were sparse, we put colour on our walls with posters we got from magazines

Fun time meeting your friends, on foot or bikes, roller boots, usually at the school you've been at all day because it was known and had no big fences around it.

We collected tapes, later CDs, which we listened to over again and had to rewind, also recorded from friends on a double deck

Recorded our favourite songs from the radio, had to pause before next one to not include the DJ's blitherings

Young teens, oldest looking member of group bought a couple of 2L cheapest cider, we all drank from

Pubs, rarely enough loo roll, we never thought to bring our own, wipe by hand or drip dry

Need a wee, you went anywhere

You walked to meet your friends then walked/staggered back, split up on way to walk on your own as girls

You didn't dare argue with a teacher, even when it was unfair as a good student

If you went to university it was a shared bathroom and kitchen between 12, one tine fridge, old pans. Then when you moved out to house share the furniture was from the 1940s, mattresses had springs sticking out, slugs were a normal practice to put outside.

You qualify, get your own first flat, most basic furnished, the slug relatives are there, you still have to go to the laundrette as no washing machine. Single glazing, you put your own film up to help.

This was if lucky, friends from less privileged areas and backgrounds were left to roam, hungry, sniffed glue, caused chaos, were always dirty, same clothes every day. When 'naughty' they were beaten by their parents and disrespected, often hit by teachers.

Things have progressed so much but there are still many living this life within their homes.

So, with the observation of MN posts about things like should I be upset about DC not being offered his favourite food at lunch time just seems so trivial compared to the reality of us as older parents.

Are younger parents picking arguments about what could be deemed as insignificant just because they can now on SM?

Yeah, I know, I will seem as a dinosaur, but Im not. Basic values need to come from home, which we as gen X experienced growing up. When you're a young child and all you know is instant gratification from screens then this is their norm, then going forward their DC. Not saying all parents do this, of course not, but sadly many do.

My point? Oh yes, growing up in harsher times, which wasn't ideal at all but it was what it was and now we appreciate the positives of now, but without knowing what it was like before is it difficult to appreciate and not succumb to a lazier way of parenting?

I recognise this bit. We used to get 8 of us in a Morris 1100 traveller ( about the size of a Polo).

F driving, dm in front passenger seat with little sis on her knee. Three eldest siblings in the back seats. Me and next sis in the boot space at the back.

If I think about it today, it makes me cringe.

I vaguely remember doing that in the UK when I was five. We had thick woolen navy blue school knickers. I left UK at 6 and we wore shorts here.

@DemelzaandRoss The children really don't get that filthy in an average day, and nor do I. If they do I'd usually put them in the shower.

Those school knickers. My school was grey or red I think. I’m sure I remember inspections! I would have been 6? And we had to show that we were wearing regulation pants.

I work in hospitality now and I'm so glad that we can just report anything like that. There are posters about red flags all over the staff areas with a contact number and email.

I shared a bath with my 2 siblings. Born 1861, north east England. Working dad. SAH mum

You must be the eldest mumsnetter on here

I'm 43 and shared baths with my two sisters, clothes were all hand me downs and we shared some clothes too, if they fitted we wore them regardless of who they were originally bought for. We were always out playing in the street on bikes roller skates skateboards etc going off to the shops by ourselves. My mum would sometimes send one of us to the corner shop with a note to fetch her cigs too. We all ate what we were given, it was that or go to bed hungry if we refused to eat. I can probably remember two occasions where we ate out as kids and that was only because the gas got cut off in the street for some reason and couldn't use the cooker to do a dinner. Other than on holidays we'd have a chippy if we went out for the day. We also never had a house phone for years I was probably in high school when we got one(most of our friends parents had one in their houses) Mobile phones were considered mostly for people who owned a business or had some kind of job that needed them to have one and I think I maybe eventually got one when I was in college

Not everyone was poor or grew up with violent parents or were allowed out all hours unsupervised, but we all had only 3 TV channels, no internet and were engulfed by cigarette smoke no matter where we were.
And white dog poo.

What’s your secret to such a long life?

And it was uphill both ways

I agree. Getting something ‘from vinted’ is perfectly acceptable, as I guess it’s not seen as ‘charity’. Also, charity shops had a stigma of ‘dead man’s clothes’, rather than ‘no longer needed’.

It was the norm that people had consecutive baths. We still do it as adults occasionally, specially if first adult only had a quick dip. (Half of mn faints away in horror).

Wow, you must be the oldest person on mums net if you were born in 1861!

I DID have cardboard inserts in my holey shoes, usually hand me downs from my brother. I had to go to school in wellies one summer. Mortifying. 1950s

Calling people by their surnames, even your closest friend’s parents. Calling someone by their ‘Christian’ name would only be done if you knew them well.

To be honest, I actually dislike that every Tom, Dick and Harry knows my first name. It’s too over familiar.

Yes, all our neighbours or shopkeepers or whoever were Mr or Mrs Surname, unless they were close family friends and they were “Aunty Firstname”. I’d forgotten about that! (1970s/80s)

There used to be a long wait for it to be installed, I think we waited about 8 weeks in our first house in 1971 and we also had one of the trendy, later mocked, trimphones. Grandchildren can't understand that people had a social life before mobiles, arrangements were made in school usually, face to face!

I remember the first time I encountered a microwave, about 1973, we ordered a couple of pasties in a pub and they asked if we'd like them warm, as we were in a rush we said No thanks, can't wait, and the barman explained it would be a couple of minutes.

Daughter's friend always called us Mr and/or Mr despite being told no need, she explained to our daughter that because we were teachers, not in her school, it dodn't seem right! Even as an adult 30+ I still didn't call Mum's friends by their Christian name.

You've mistaken surviving poor parenting for benefiting from it.

Wiping yourself with your bare hands after taking a piss is grim!

I (1964 vintage) agree with a lot of this, but "Need a wee? You went anywhere."? I think not!!