I was reading this thread last night when the education part came up
I'm dyslexic and have a narcissist mother/enabling father (she's ruined every relationship I've ever had with men,bar dp by meddling and shitstirring)
My mother thought education was a waste of time and somewhere to dump us through the day
She wouldn't have dreamed of backing up the teachers if we misbehaved (well,she'd have come down on me like a ton of bricks as the scapegoat but her precious golden child boys could do no wrong)
My father valued education and tried to teach us himself but was batted down from all angles by her
I left school with no gcses and just thought I was thick
Grew up,had dc and decided I wanted to learn a trade and went back to collage
She went mental (I was in my 30's by this point) and suddenly found i wasn't thick-i started passing exams so she started telling lies like I only passed because I was handing bjs out to the tutors and cheating
I passed the course,which set her off on another narc rant
I was nc by this point so she cut me off from everyone I loved and turned them against me
She uses guilt,money,blackmail and fear of being the next scapegoat to control the rest of them-they are so caught up in the web shes span,they can't break free and she unleashes the flying monkeys on a regular basis (only a few weeks ago,my brother was full of 'i miss you!' we both know he doesn't,he just wants to report back to headquarters)
The other sons girlfriends will be 'safe' unless they move a toenail out of line and then they'll be out-they look like V which sounds weird but all 3 of my brothers have married women who look/behave like my mother
This seems to be what's happening here-thankfully brooklyn has untangled himself but it's a painful experience
You lose everyone dear to you and if you dare to make bonds with anyone else,they ruin that too until you meet someone who doesn't put up with their crap (in his case it's nicola and mine is dp and his family)
I feel for harper-she will be missing her brother dearly,cannot understand what is happening within her own family,uneducated and cannot break free
I hope she manages it one day-the boys are in too deep and will toe the line