To wonder why colleagues can be so nasty?

[canofcream]

I’m very new in my job and I’ve come across someone so nasty. Two emails she’s sent to me (both group emails) where she’s just torn me apart.

I’m quite thick skinned but honestly I had a cry after the last email. I’m tempted to just email her privately and just say - look I’m new and trying my best, can you please have some respect when talking to me.

Difficult to know without context
What exactly did she say?

More context needed - what was the criticism? Was it justified?

If she tore you apart in a group email - twice - what have other people said? If it was awful and unwarranted, which it sounds like you think it is, then surely other people stood up for you, told her to wind her neck in, etc? Not saying I don't believe you but it seems odd in the context of someone being brand new to a job and someone else going in with their fangs bared twice in as many days.

I just re-read - so she sent these emails to OTHERS and THEN forwarded on to you? Weird behaviour of the highest order. What did she say to you when she forwarded them on? Have any of your other colleagues said anything? Sorry it's so hard to grasp anything from the limited information we have at the moment.

More context needed. Is she your manager/mentor? Have you being doing work on her behalf and are these emails her idea of feedback? Is the feedback fair? Some people's way of demonstrating they can manage people is to give very negative "feedback" and make sure they cc every manger into it. It is also a power play. Can you show your manager and explain you think it's unfair and unpleasant?

@canofcream
More context is needed but
If she's a boss
It may be a power move as she has to have someone to lord it over so I'd keep all evidence, state facts and speak to her about her conduct and also
Is there an HR dept/Union rep you can speak to about this?
Don't email privately
She's counting on your timidity in this circumstance to harangue you

My guess is she’s a racist.

Speak up now - she’s a bully.

Are you being goady?

Flag it with your boss or her boss. Nip it in the bud now and show her you mean business. Bullies rely on you not standing up for yourself. Don’t worry about being unpopular.

Huh?? Being disliked and you can’t figure out why is racism! What’s goady about that? I don’t know what you mean.

Where did you get the idea that it’s involving racism though? OP didn’t mention that, unless she’s posted before?